A Love Story
By Eolake Stobblehouse

Zxmtsk was one of the most beautiful females of her people. Built like a tank and strong like a tank, her bright blue hide and hundreds of stump tentacles became the focus of every male who encountered her. The scent of her powerful chemical makeup, which helped her survive on her harsh home world, was a natural aphrodisiac to her suitors.

She didn't have much time for romance, though. Being an eminent specimen of a species built for battle, she was busy carving a career as a mercenary in turbulent parts of the galaxy, and she loved her job.

One day romance caught up with her. Among the smoking ruins of the once-gleaming towers of the capital of Heeeerooiys, she found herself perceptive-organs-to-perceptive-organs with a huge green male, even bigger and stronger than herself, and handsome as a god, his skin oozing and his scent dominating the formerly idyllic city square.

Being an alien from the TiiiLx2II people of +iii9, he was nevertheless an instant revelation to Zxmtsk, she felt like she had found her soul mate. And oh! so beautiful he was!

The male, named E=MC3, was not immune to the female charms of Zxmtsk either. They feel instantly and hopelessly in love. They both felt that the fact that they were of different species was a technicality which should not stand in the way of true love.

At the earliest R&R they managed to arrange, they got married and sped off to their honeymoon.

Among the peaceful seas and mountains of one of the not-too-touristy vacation planets, they celebrated their love. They danced and they laughed, oh how they laughed and danced.

E=MC3 was a gentle and patient being, and he did not rush the physical relationship. In fact Zxmtsk found that in the end it was up to herself to take initiative. So one morning they ordered room service in the splendid seaside hotel, and stayed in to consummate their marriage.

It was a cool morning, but soon the room heated up from their love, and it was fortunate that the hotel was built to house guest even bigger and stronger than our dear lovers, because it quickly got a bit wild. Their huge bodies bounded around the room in the throes of love and passion.

Soon, amidst all the joy, Zxmtsk started to feel that her physiological changes were different than was normal, and it looked like E=MC3 was having trouble too.

And then there was the way they suddenly stuck together, and the temperature started rising alarmingly. It soon became clear that their passion had stirred an incompatibility between their bodies’ individual molecular makeup, and a big reaction was coming fast.

The resulting explosion laid waste to most of the hotel, killed 345 sentients and 987 robot servants, and left the site uninhabitable for decades. Zxmtsk and E=MC3 were both dazed and seriously bruised, and very disappointed.

Later in her old age, Zxmtsk would tell her grandchildren, in a hushed voice, how she had once met her soul mate, and he was not their grandfather. He had been a prince amongst warriors, and handsome like a dream. But they had decided to go their separate ways, it was a love not to be. The chemistry simply had not been right.